Metallic Onslaught Show Archive

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Recap by The Metal Wulf; Okay, so one of those nights where things didn't go quite according to plan. Sorrow Of Batavia couldn't make it, and there was no sign of Richard Venice or Dewey, but hell, that's alright. These circumstances usually just mean more focus on music, and maybe just a little more random silliness. Not such a bad thing, really!

I got the guys laughing pretty hard early on in the show as we all shared a Beavis And Butthead moment. I've been able to do a solid imitation of Mr. Anderson's voice for years, and it's always good for a chuckle, but this went on for a good chunk of the talk break, and at one point I'm pretty sure I had Rick in tears from laughing so hard!
Hey, just a sign that I'm doing something right!

Josh departed a little early, and there was some speculation as to why. We think it may have been because I didn't let him ride me around the parking area again. Hey, what the hell does he want? I'm a werewolf, not a damned pony! Besides, once should be enough!
Jeeeeeez...

Jeffie continued his doubtful ways as to my status as a lycanthropic terror. Jeeez, this guy just doesn't give up!
He even went so far as to introduce a new interview segment called "Long And Deep With Jeffie: Banging It In, Filling Up All Night (Now With Extra Llamas!)".
Gotta give him credit, he pulled through with the llamas. There were probably about half a dozen or so roaming around the studio.
So, we had our little interview, and I had to go into the whole back story of my origins as a werewolf again. For those who missed out on the story when I first appeared on the show, here's a synopsis:

In January of 1984 (the week of my 18th birthday!), Ozzy Osbourne came to Rochester, NY on his Bark At The Moon tour. This was my first show, and on my way back to the car I got separated from my friends somehow. I'd found my way to the backstage area and ended up getting knocked loopy by what I suspect was a whiskey bottle thrown by Nikki Sixx of Motley Crue, who were the opening act on that tour.
Anyhoo...
I returned to consciousness to discover somebody urinating heavily near my prone body. Now, this really didn't sit well with me, and when I looked up and started yelling at the person to stop, I noticed it was Ozzy himself!
Well, Ozzy didn't take too well to my verbal lashings, and he immediately transformed into a werewolf in front of me! (Just think of the Bark At The Moon cover, you'll know what I mean!) And then, he BIT ME!!!!
Well, from that night on, I not only transformed on the full moon, but I also changed whenever heavy metal music played!
Yeah, life sure got interesting after that!
Anyway, there's more to the tale, especially the events that led Steve Papagiorgio to discover me in Mexico, but that's a story for another day.
Maybe...

Further interrogation into the "hands coming off" incident occurred, and I just couldn't seem to convince him that I'm having a little problem in the excess shedding department.
I don't think Jeffie's gonna let go of this any time soon. Oh well, what ya gonna do?

The evening came to a close amidst a small amount of bloody carnage in the station. Hey, it was a full moon, and those llamas were DAMNED tasty!
Hell, I ate like a king in that last half hour, and imagine my surprise when Foul Mouth Girl decided to jump in to make a kill!
Wow, I never took her for the blood-thirsty type!
As for Jeffie, he ended the night in shock, crying over the massacre of his beloved furry llama friends.
Me? Hell, I just used a chunk of rib bone to pick my teeth!